"I got Jesus in a bottle. You see? This is SOAP."
-church this morning

"Now... you're young. The way I figure it, you're only young once... But then, you're only dead once too... so if you wanna reach an age other than young and dead, you might just wanna start thinking a little more defensively..."
-Han Solo, Not a Nice man by SoloFalcon, Fanfiction.net

Translation of the 23rd Psalm by the Khmus Tribe of Laos

The Great Boss is the one who takes care of my sheep
I don't want to own anything.
The Great Boss wants me to lie down in the field.
He wants me to go to the lake.
He makes my good spirit come back.
Even though I walk through something the missionary calls the valley of the shadow of death, I do not care.
You are with me.
You use a stick and a club to make me comfortable.
You manufacture a piece of furniture right in front of my eyes while my enemies watch.
You pour car grease on my head.
My cup has too much water in it and therefore overflows.
Goodness and kindness will walk single-file behind me all my life.
And I will live in the hut of the Great Boss until I die and am forgotten by the tribe.

"I used to have an open mind. But my brains kept falling out."
-lol

the princess bride

"To the death!"
"No! To the pain."
"I'm not sure I'm familiar with that phrase."
"I'll explain, and I'll use small words so that you'll be sure to understand you warthog faced buffoon."
"That may be the first time a man has dared insult me."
"It won't be the last. To the pain means that first you lose your feet at the ankles, then your arms at the wrists, followed by your nose."
"And then my tongue I suppose. I killed you too quickly last time, a mistake I intend to remedy tonight."
"I wasn't finished! The next thing you lose will be your eyes (?)-"
"And then my ears I understand let's get on with it!"
"Wrong! Your ears you keep and I'll tell you why. So that every shriek of every child at the sight of your hideousness will be yours to cherish, so that every woman's cry of 'Dear God, what is that thing?' will echo forever in your perfect ears. THAT is what to the pain means. It means I leave you in anguish, wallowing in freakish misery for ever."
"I think you're bluffing."
"It's possible. I might be bluffing. It's concieveble that I only lie here, because I lack the strength to stand. But then again, perhaps I have the strength after all." *stands* "Drop. Your. Sword."
*Sword clatters to the ground.*
-The Princess Bride, Weslely and Prince Humperdink
(This was entirely from memory, so I apologize for any discrepancies with the actual lines.)

"I do not mean to pry, but do you by any chance have six fingers on your left hand?"
"Do all your conversations start this way?"
-The Princess Bride
"Why are you smiling?"
"Because I know something you don't know!"
"What is that?"
"I am not left-handed!"
-The Princess Bride

"Have fun storming the castle boys!"
"Do you think it'll work?"
"It'll take a miracle!"
-Miracle Max, The Princess Bride

"Fezzick, are there rocks ahead?"
"If there are, we'll all be dead!"
"NO MORE RHYMING! I MEAN IT!"
"Anybody want a peanut?"

"MAWAGE! MAWAGE IS WHAT BRINGS US TOGETHUR TODAY. MAWAGE, THAT BWESSED AWANGEMENT! THAT DWEAM WIVIN A DWEAM!"
The Princess Bride

"AND WUVE, TWUE WUVE SHALL FOLLOW YOU FOREVER..."

"Hello! my name is inigo montoya! You killed my father! Prepare to die!

You fell victim to one of the classic blunders! The first is never get involved with a land war in asia. But only slightly less well known is this: Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line! ahhhaaahhaaahh—

Asura (Kishinn): "After you sealed me away, I thought about a great many things. After all, the only freedom allowed to me after being stuffed inside that skin, was the freedom to think."
Death: "Yeah sorry about that. This time I promise to kill you properly."

Anime: Soul Eater

Hark what light through yonder window breaks...wait!...light broke the window?

"You want me to be honest, or like you?"
"Are you saying I'm a liar?"
"You're an optimist. Same thing basically."
-Avatar the Last Airbender, Sokka, Katara